What if E.T. was never able to phone home and wound up stuck on Earth? And what if, after years of hearing people speak English, E.T. could kind of fake sounding like a person? And what if E.T. then idolized Joe Rogan and started . . .

Stuttering John “won” a conversation at the pub and can’t wait to tell us all about it. It’s not a surprise, John knows more about politics and does all the research. So of course he’s going to school his “mates” at the Scotland Yard.

This week we check in on the “dirtbag left,” (their term, not mine) and try to figure out who’s the dullest person in the room. These people could suck the energy out of a nuclear power plant. Also, I’m an idiot because I didn’t . . .

Only Tom Myers would put out a 2-part “best of 2022” podcast in July. The guy who looks like It dares us to clown him.

Vinnie Paulino joins the show to get irritated immediately. We’re then joined by Cardiff Electric who is totally not . . .

Two guys who made some pretty funny sketch comedy videos for College Humor back in the day are now coasting on their minimal success in show business with an “advice” style podcast. If they would just change the title to “Phoning It In” I . . .

Big news in the world of the Dabblers, Stuttering John finally admits what everyone has known since Muttering John’s convincing report, that he’s been substitute teaching for extra cash. Or maybe because he likes it and wants to give back to his community. Who . . .